Presentation Transcript

1. CONVINCE ME!Persuasion Techniques That Get Things Done

   Kevin Kline, SQL Sentry Director of Engineering Services Microsoft SQL Server MVP since 2003 Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn @KEKline Websites: http://KevinEKline.com/ , http://ForITPros.com
2. Free Swag from sql sentry FreePlan Explorer download: http://www.sqlsentry.net/plan-explorer/ Free query tuning consultations: http://answers.sqlperformance.com. Free new ebook (regularly $10) to attendees. Send request to sales@sqlsentry.net. SQL Server educational videos, scripts, and slides: http://SQLSentry.TV Tuning blog: http://www.sqlperformance.com/ Monthly eNews tips and tricks: http://www.sqlsentry.net/newsletter-archive.asp
3. Agenda Dispelling Some Myths Introverts and Extroverts Natural-born Leaders Influence that carries weight Three appeals that persuade Logical: the Head Emotional: the Heart Cooperative: the Hands Summary
4. Dispelling Some Myths How much do personality types effect influence and persuasiveness? How much does innate abilities effect influence and persuasiveness? In both cases, influence and persuasion are BEHAVIORS, not TRAITS.
5. Building Influence Remember the Law of Reciprocity Political Capital
6. Technical Competence Know the answers for relevant tech questions. Or know where to find the answers. Have an opinion! Even if the opinion is “No opinion”. Base opinions on shared values. Present relevant information when appropriate. Cite sources for backup. Work harder than your peers. Put in a full measure. Stay focused. Self-awareness, especially for strengths vs weaknesses. Care.
7. Communicator Know the value of B.L.U.F. Strive for brevity, then ask “Want more details?”. Know your audience. Use relatable examples or analogies. Keep ego out. Remember, you’re communicating even when you say nothing. Differentiate fact vs. value statements. Stay focused.
8. Listener Be respectful. Be “fully present”. Good questioning skills involve: Getting the specifics Seek fact vs. value. Use open vs. closed questions. Observing reaction Good listening skills involve: Acknowledging statements Summarizing Empathizing Ninja secret: Understand the power of silence!
9. Team Builder Tout team successes, not individual successes. Preparedness for “Leadership Moments”. Emergencies – a “clutch” player Periods of upheaval or dramatic change An informed, but dispassionate and flexible opinion. Knowing the options and their pros / cons Open to other ideas / opinions Knowing what the organization is trying to achieve Leads to becoming the Go-To-Guy/Gal
10. Professionalism Lots of words: engaged, competent, credible, accountable, honest, integrity, goal-oriented, autonomous, et al. Care and respect: Treating everyone as you’d like to be treated Facilitate consensus and good decisions. Mitigate conflict and confrontation. Consistency and Constancy. Personal presentation and Image: Speech and dress Don’t be “THAT GUY”. Teach … with a positive attitude.
11. Passive Influence Becomes Political Capital Build political capital, so that you’re more likely to sway decisions when you make requests or express opinions. Aim for basic competency in: Technical credibility Communication skills Listening skills Team building Professionalism Train to overcome your weaknesses or get an ally. One weakness generally isn’t an obstacle. Two or more weakness can be a big obstacle.
12. Direct Influence, also known as Persuasion Swaying opinion through “appeals”: Logical, a.k.a. “The Head” Emotional, a.k.a. “The Heart” Cooperative, a.k.a. “The Hands”
13. Alliances Appealing up Call in a debt / favor Consultation Direct Influence / Persuasion: Methods of DIRECT Influence Rational Appeal Intimidation Inspirational Appeal Flattery Influence is like … banking… and physics…
14. Logical, Head Appeals Rational Appeal versus Intimidation When and How? When your audience is rational Build a case of rational facts Make a careful SWOT analysis Use a proposal or “suggestion” format (WIFM) Make a pitch and then explicitly follow-up Common mistakes include: Too much detail/data without setting the big picture or major goal Misunderstanding the interest of the audience Failing to bounce the idea off of others ahead of time Failure to align with the goals/needs of the audience
15. Emotional, Heart Appeals Inspirational Appeal versus Flattery When and How? When your audience is motivated by values Appeals to our “better selves” Requires strong, in-person delivery Make a pitch and then explicitly follow-up Common mistakes include: Insincerity or hypocrisy Double-standards Failure to follow-up and follow-thru
16. Cooperative, Hand Appeals Alliance | Consultation | Call in a debt / Favor When and how? When your audience is similarly inclined Use WIFM or “Doing well by doing good” Recognize the transactional nature Appealing up When and how? Only in the face of serious obstacles or ethical breaches Recognize the potential for “paybacks” Common mistakes include: Overuse Failing to reciprocate Only recognizing the transactional nature of the social bond
17. Communicating Upward Case Study: Convincing the boss
18. Summary: Convince Me Dispelled Some Myths Introverts and Extroverts Natural-born Leaders Influence that carries weight Credibility, Communicator, Listener, Team Builder, Professional Three appeals that persuade Logical: the Head Emotional: the Heart Cooperative: the Hands
19. Resources http://www.ccl.org/leadership/index.aspx My favorite leadership training organization http://www.techrepublic.com/blog/tech-manager Good on-line resource with lots of topical content and forums http://www.sqlpass.org Professional development vChapter http://ForITPros.com My professional development site specifically for IT pros
20. Thank you! Q & A time Send questions to me at: kevin_e_kline@yahoo.com Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn at @kekline Blogs at SQLblog.com, SQLMag.com, DBTA.com IT leadership and professional development content at http://ForITPros.com Technical content and Slides at http://KevinEKline.com/Slides/ THANK YOU!