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MANAGING CONFLICT. DEALING WITH DIFFICULT ADULTS. 5 MYTHS ABOUT CONFLICT MANAGEMENT. 1. The presence of conflict is a sign of a poor manager. 2. Conflict is a sign of low concern for the organization. 3. Anger is negative and destructive. 4. Conflict, if left alone, will take care of itself.
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MANAGING CONFLICT DEALING WITH DIFFICULT ADULTS
5 MYTHS ABOUT CONFLICT MANAGEMENT • 1. The presence of conflict is a sign of a poor manager. • 2. Conflict is a sign of low concern for the organization. • 3. Anger is negative and destructive. • 4. Conflict, if left alone, will take care of itself. • 5. Conflict must be resolved.
conflicts enable us to be aware of problems; conflicts encourage change; conflicts make life more interesting; disagreement causes decisions to be re-thought a good argument can resolve tensions; conflicts help you know yourself better; conflicts can deepen a relationship; conflicts, when not taken TOO seriously, can be FUN! THE VALUE OF CONFLICT
IN ORDER TO MANAGE CONFLICT EFFECTIVELY: • HAVE AN ACCURATE PERCEPTION OF THE CONFLICT; • COMMUNICATE CLEARLY WITH THE OTHER PERSON; • CONSTRUCT A TRUSTFUL CLIMATE; • HAVE A STRUCTURE FOR RESOLUTION.
CHARACTERISTICS: • INCREASED CONCERN FOR SELF; • INCREASED IMPORTANCE OF “FACE” • NICE PEOPLE TURN NASTY • USUAL STRATEGIES DON’T WORK • INDIVIDUALS CAN BE DIFFERENT FROM GROUPS
3 STAGES OF CONFLICT STAGE I: DAILY EVENTS STAGE II: CHALLENGES STAGE III: BATTLES
STAGE I: DAILY EVENTS • IS IT RELATED TO PAST EVENTS? • WHAT DO WE AGREE ON? • CAN WE BUILD A NEW FRAMEWORK? • IS IT MORE A MATTER OF EMOTION?
STAGE II:CHALLENGES • IS THE ATMOSPHERE SAFE? • BE HARD ON FACTS, SOFT ON PEOPLE • SHARE RESPONSIBILITY FOR FINDING ALTERNATIVES • LOOK FOR MIDDLE GROUND-WIN-WIN • ALLOW TIME
STAGE III: BATTLES • PAY ATTENTION TO DETAILS • CONSIDER OUTSIDE HELP • IDENTIFY THOSE AT LOWER STAGES OF CONFLICT, AND BEGIN REDIRECTING THEM • TAKE TIME
STYLES FOR MANGING DIFFERENCES high pers. mod pers im- pers flexibility of viewpoint firm mod. firm flexible
Roadmap for handling conflict plan strategy diagnose issues problem-solve implement and evaluate
7 C’s of Conflict Management • Characteristics • Classification • Constructive • Credibility • Conditional • Care • Constraint
Remember: conflict may be a grace-filled moment, an opportunity for us to see with different eyes, to learn the ‘deep down’ about the other person, and to come to a place where we agree to disagree agreeably.-SCC