An effective thesis statement

1. An effective thesis statement By Lucy Liu

2. The thesis statement The thesis statement declares the main purpose or controlling ideas of your entire essay. Ideally it is a one sentence summary of the whole essay. For students writers, the thesis statement is a matter of serious consideration always in exposition.

3. Here are the features of an effective thesis statement: ※It is the most important statement — the writer’s attitude opinion on the subject---in the introduction. ※It is expressed in clear and specific terms. ※It may indicate the pattern of organization. ※It often contains controlling ideas or subdivisions that will be used in the topic sentences of the essay.

4. Let us examine these thesis statements: • In choosing a major, a student has to consider various factors, such as personal interest, job opportunities and the availability of training. (Each of these controlling ideas will be used in the topic sentence in the support part).

5. Make up another example: In hunting for a job, one has to ….

6. b. The professional of law demands three qualities of mind: the ability to analyze ideas, an interest in people, and patience with ideas.(The writer limits the scope of the discussion to the qualities of the mind only.)

7. Make up another example: The profession of teaching demands …

8. c. Pets such as dogs and cats raised In our neighborhood present a serious health hazard. (The writer’s attitude on raising pets is explicit)

9. Make up another example: Drunk driving ….

10. d. My mother’s childhood and mine were the opposite: our schooling and our activities after school show the dramatic differences in our life.(Besides narrowing the subject to two aspects---schooling and after school activities, the writer indicates the pattern of development—by contrast.)

11. Make up another example: Chinese teachers and foreign ones were the opposite: …

12. compare the thesis statement below Poor: Living in an apartment for the first time can teach you many things about taking care of yourself. Better: By living in an apartment, freshmen can learn valuable lessons in financial planning and time management.

13. Poor: Friendship is a wonderful thing. Better:For the friendships I have and the friendships I see are conducted at many levels of intensity, serve many different functions, meet different needs and range from those as all-the way as the friendship of the soul sisters to that of the most casual playmates. (The writer makes it clear that the essay will consider a variety of friendships and the pattern of development is classification.)

14. Here is a list of don’ts that you should keep in mind: ◇Don’t make your introduction too long or too broad. Your introduction is to prepare reader, not to confuse him or waste his time. ◇Don’t treat the reader as someone who is sitting next to you as you write. Don’t use phrases like “Now I will tell you…”Or “Now I’m going to show you …”

15. ◇Don’t simply make your thesis a description of our intention . Avoid statements like “I’m going to discuss student cheating in the essay.” ◇Don’t clutter your thesis with expressions such as “in my opinion”, and “from my point of view.” Your essay obviously express your own opinion.

16. ◇Don’t substitute the thesis statement with a question. A thesis can never be in the form of a question. It must be a complete sentence.

17. Exercise 1: Underline the controlling ideas in the following thesis statements. • Women generally live longer than men for two main reasons: they tend to take better care of their health, and they lead less stressful lives. • Americans have made many valuable contributions to American culture, particularly in the areas of language, art, food and government.

18. 3. Living in the twentieth century has certain advantages such as a higher standard of living, but it also has some disadvantages such as a polluted environment , the depersonalization of human relationships, and the weakening of spiritual values. 4. Beautiful scenery, exotic seafood and excellent shopping attract and delight the tourist in this coastal city.

19. 5. Two years in the army provided me with a valuable experience. There, for the first time, I learned the values of discipline, neatness, and respect for authority. 6. It is no wonder that a shadow of gloom hangs over the things and the people that surround me in this room.

20. Exercise 2: Write an introduction including the thesis statement on each topic given. • A popular sport • My most difficult subject in college • Advertisements • Campus problems

21. Possible answer: • Basketball has gained tremendous popularity due to its excitement, competitiveness and spirit of teamwork. • Working on computers is the most difficult subject I had ever taken in college, for it needs much patience , and a quick mind.

22. 3. When advertisements are properly referred to and made use of by customers they are extremely helpful, as they provide necessary information for customers such as the features of a certain product, the place and the means to get that product. or: Advertisements are always misleading, for its exaggeration and effect of mouthpiece.

23. 4. Among the campus problems are A B and C.

24. Concluding paragraph: Restating the thesis in fresh terms or summarizing the key points are the most common forms of reminding the reader of what you have said as illustrated with the three samples below:

25. Thesis Friendship is both a source of pleasure and a component of good health. Restatement : Circumstances and people are constantly changing. Some friendship last forever; others do not. Nevertheless, friendship is an essential ingredient in the making of a healthy and rewarding life.

26. Thesis Although there is a period of about 200 years between the two music giants, they are similar in certain ways. summary: The name of Beethoven and Lenon are inscribed on the monument to the history of music. They will always be remembered for their unique styles, great productivity, and indomitable personalities.

27. 3. thesis: Soap operas have gained tremendous popularity by creating a more desirable lifestyle for modern viewers. Restatement and summary: soap opera are popular not because they are mindless drivel formulated to distract us from our daily chores, but because they present life as many of us want it to be; fast-paced, glamorous, and full of exciting characters.

28. More often, adding a final comment can greatly strengthen your stand on the subject and extends the controlling idea of the essay. The final comment may take various forms: • Put a rhetorical question to provoke a thinking • Propose a solution to the problem

29. 3. A final evaluation of the subject a) whether forced by job or pushed by eagerness for more knowledge, those who devote themselves to graduate studies should be praised, because they will form a strong intellectual power in building our country and will symbolize the rising of our national educational level. b) The renewed enthusiasm in graduate studies is caused by the wish for a better life, the pressure of challenge and the drive to accomplish one’s goal. It’s shaped by society, but in turn, it also helps to shape and benefit society.

30. 4. A prediction of the future The great advantage to shorter workweek is that workers have more time off to themselves and their families. However, considering the financial demands upon American families in the future, it may also become common for workers to hold down to two full-time jobs at one time. Given the American works ethic, most workers will probably fill their free time with more work instead of more leisure.

31. 5. A warning that alerts the reader Finally, when we use a euphemism, we should be aware that we are trying to make an idea more acceptable. At times, this may be preferable , but let’s not forget that euphemisms camouflage reality. After all, “coloring the truth” is still lying.

32. 6. A witty remark that impresses the reader. Many of us tend to use long words to speak our minds. If they say just what we want, that’s okay. But if big words make the way dark for those who hear what we way and read what we write, we might as well use small words. Like fast friends, they won’t let us down.

33. A statement of the essay’s broader implications In conclusion, although the twentieth century has indeed given us a lot of advantages by making us richer, healthier, and freer to enjoy our lives, it has , in my opinion, not made us wiser. The twentieth century has made our Earth dirtier, our people less humane, and our spiritual lives poorer. We should continue to enjoy the benefits of technological advancements because they have given us freedom to

34. pursue our interests and goals. However, we must make a concerted effort to preserve our natural environment for future generation. Moreover, we should take the time now to make our lives more meaningful in an increasingly impersonal and mechanized society.

35. A few more tips on writing the concluding paragraph ☆Start with a narrow statement to connect the concluding paragraph with the previous one. ☆avoid bringing in any new topic. ☆maintain the same tone as in the rest of the essay. ☆don’t apologize that you can’t offer profound analysis. No one expects you to be an expert. ☆End the essay briefly and naturally.

36. Exercise :Write ending paragraph according to the introductory paragraphs provided. Throughout our life, we occasionally suffer set-backs and become losers. We may fail to adjust ourselves to a new surrounding; we may lose a competition, we may get stuck in work and give up half way. The attitude people adopt towards their failures differ greatly. Some react positively, some negatively, some indifferently. According to their reaction , losers in life fall into three classes: the optimistic , the pessimistic, and the indifferent.

37. Possible answer: Obviously, we should take an optimistic attitude towards failure. With positive reaction, one may learn to come to terms with himself and the world around him, and he may also know how to draw lessons from his failure and make efforts to avoid its repetition. On the contrary, Pessimism and indifference will only deprive us of more opportunities for success. Anyone who fails to recognize this point will pay a heavy price for these attitude.

38. The path of life is always rugged and rough. Most of the time, we feel we are living under pressure and stress. It will be easier for us to take pains and blues brought by stress if we can distinguish the kind of stress we suffer from. Stress may affect us instantly, periodically, or lifelong.

39. Possible answer: No doubt, all of us feel varying degrees of stress which gives us discomfort. On the other hand, stress can affect us in a positive way. Controlled and handled properly, it can turn into a driving force which spurs us forward. To bring it under control, the first and foremost step is to identify the causes of stress.