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Who do you have the hardest time getting along with? Why do you think you have such a hard time getting along with that person?. What do you think you could do to improve communication with the person you struggle to get along with? . Communicaiton. 23. 3 COMMUNICATION STYLES.
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Who do you have the hardest time getting along with? Why do you think you have such a hard time getting along with that person?
What do you think you could do to improve communication with the person you struggle to get along with?
23. 3 COMMUNICATION STYLES • CHILD- Easiest & Most natural to use- very immature and the least effective. Ex) “I want, You’re so dumb, etc” • Whining, Yelling, Not Listening, Ordering • PARENT-This style has NOTHING to do with age or being a father/mother. Directs behaviors- gets someone to comply and gets the point across. Ex) Giving instructions, demanding, punishing, “Lend me a dollar. Mom, get me a cookie!” • ADULT-Highest level and most desirable/effective. Open, two-way communication, trusting others, respecting opinions, controlling emotions. Ex) Think of one you have had
INTRAPERSONAL Skills • Definition: Those used to communicate with oneself • Examples: self-control, self-discipline, accepting responsibilities, self-talk
INTERPERSONAL INTERPERSONAL SKILLS: OTHERS
Interpersonal • Definition: Those used to communicate with others • Examples: listening, talking, problem-solving, understanding
Why is it important to have both sets of skills? • They help us to understand our own behavior • They help us to cope with circumstances of life • They help us to control situations we find ourselves in
Comic Version II • Write a comic (next to the one from yesterday) using the same characters. This set must also show at least 3 scenes and needs to be about one of the 3 communication styles (child, parent, adult)
Methods of Expressing Emotion/Communicating • Passive: • Characteristics: Blushes when someone looks his/her way. Agrees with EVERYONE. “Yes, you’re right” “I agree.” • Buys from every door-to-door salesman • Uses phrases like “They say” • Takes blame • Makes others feel guilty by letting others walk all over them • Often apologizes in a conversation
Aggressive • Tells others what he/she wants and then talks them into it • Gets angry when someone disagrees • Rams opinions down people’s throats • Demands for explanations • Very critical • Must be in charge • Gets even with sarcasm • Listens by interrupting
Assertive • Buys only what they need • States opinion matter of factly • Negotiates and compromises • Smiles frequently • Takes credit when it’s due • Can admit he/she is wrong • Cooperates well with others • Listens when others speak
Implications • Of the three types, which is the most successful? • What type of person would you want to communicate with? • What kind of communicator are you?
There are 3 types of communication: • Constructive • Destructive • Non-verbal
Constructive Communication • This contributes to a meaningful exchange of ideas and/or leads to understanding.
Examples are: -Giving positive or encouraging messages -Asking questions -Sending clear, concise messages -Being honest and open -Keeping the confidences of other people -Speaking with respect -Using tact- (communicating something sensitive without hurting or offending) -Being a good listener
Destructive Communication This is talk that “hurts.” Some messages discourage rather than encourage helpful or constructive communication.
Examples are: -Insults, harassing, teasing -Gossip, lies, blaming and accusing -“You” messages -Sexual Harassment -Threatening -Sarcasm- (when a person says one message, but nonverbal expressions and the tone of voice send another message) -Interrupting or dominating the conversation -Swearing
Non-Verbal: • Nonverbal communication is the way a person expresses him/herself through movement, posture, and facial expression. It is possible to send one type of verbal message and at the same time, a different type with body language. Nonverbal communication is VERY powerful and can often be misinterpreted.
Communication Tip #1 • Use “I” messages! - I feel ~ makes you responsible for the statement • When ~ Describes the situation • Because ~ tells why you feel the way you do (This really works!! You should try it!)
Tip #2 • Be clear - Say what you mean and mean what you say!
Tip #3 • Ask questions • If you are not clear on what someone is saying….ASK QUESTIONS!! • Restate what someone has said to make sure that you really did understand what they said. “S0 you are feeling sad because…”
Tip #4 • Be a good listener - Studies indicate that 60 percent of the time that you communicate is spent listening! If you are a poor listener you are a poor communicator.
Crazy Sentences!!! • Are you listening?