Counseling Gifted Students

1. Counseling Gifted Students Component 9 of the Competencies Collaboration SEVA Council of Gifted Administrators

2. Table of Contents • Pre-Assessment • What is the role of the school counselor in gifted education? • Social-emotional differences in gifted students • Effective counseling strategies for gifted students • Family issues and parent support • Counseling for courses, college, and careers • School counselors should not say… • Summary – how can counselors help? • Resources Note: Although this module is geared towards school counselors, classroom teachers will also find useful information and insights.

3. Reflection Question • How is counseling gifted students different from counseling other students? Reach for the stars! The images in this presentation are pictures of galaxies taken by the Hubble telescope.

4. Role of counselor The role of the counselor is to be an empowering agent of change, who is: • Non-judgmental • Empathetic • Validating • Respectful • And who is an advocate, a cheerleader, a persuader, an educator, an observer, and a guide. The goals of counseling are to: • Use counseling expertise to assist students in dealing with challenges • Help students solve problems or accept situations that cannot be changed • Help students gain an understanding of their situation and experiences The counselor’s role and goals are the same for gifted as for general education, but the strategies and focus will need to be different.

5. Effective counseling strategies for gifted students A counselor can be most effective if he or she: • Uses vocabulary and and concepts appropriate to the student’s intellectual reasoning capabilities (‘talking down” to these students won’t work) • Uses a dynamic approach instead of a passive or nondirective approach (analyzing, clarifying, paraphrasing, prioritizing, and summarizing techniques can be effective) • Engages the student in questioning and challenging, without being defensive • Engages the student in a collaborative effort to determine goals and resolve issues • Helps the student manage stress when the student cannot control a situation • Is honest, realistic, and not overly optimistic – these students can see through a “fake” response • Uses appropriate humor • Is self-reflective

6. A counselor should also: • Have a basic understanding of giftedness so that she does not misinterpret typical aspects of gifted behaviors or allow herself to be manipulated by the student • Take students’ issues seriously and know when to refer– while some students may exhibit mild depression related to their giftedness, others may have serious depression that needs to be treated clinically • Help students understand that developmental anxieties are normal. Some gifted students may not share their concerns with parents because they assume that if they are smart, they should be able to “figure it out” for themselves – and revealing fears could lead to a loss of image.

7. Social-emotional needs of gifted students • Gifted students are generally as well adjusted as the general population, but there are some characteristics inherent to gifted students that can cause distress if not addressed. • Gifted students’ behaviors and issues can be exacerbated by an inappropriate educational setting; sustained gifted services along with appropriate counseling support and interventions can be critical in meeting their needs.

8. Potential counseling issues for gifted students: • Underachievement • Defiance, rebelliousness • Extreme sensitivities interpreted as overreactions • Peer relationship difficulties, social difficulties • Poor self-concept • Perfectionism • Depression • Asynchrony of skill development • Frustration due to lack of educational challenge • Anxiety • Introversion, deliberate self-isolation • Lack of motivation • Feeling isolated, misunderstood, or out of place • Misdiagnosis – is the behavior due to giftedness? ADHD? A learning disability? Boredom?

9. Possible problems related to giftedness Strengths Possible Problems Acquires/retains information quickly Impatient with others; dislikes basic routine Inquisitive, searches for significance Asks embarrassing questions; excessive in interests Intrinsic motivation Strong-willed; resists direction Enjoys problem-solving; able to conceptualize the Resists routine practice; questions teaching procedures and abstract, synthesizes assignments Seeks cause-effect Dislikes unclear/illogical areas and relations (e.g., traditions or feelings) Emphasizes truth, equity, and fair play Worries about humanitarian concerns Seeks to organize things and people Constructs complicated rules; often seen as bossy Large vocabulary; advanced, broad Information May use words to manipulate; bored with school and age-peers High expectations of self and others Intolerant, perfectionist; may become depressed Creative/inventive; likes new ways of doing things May be seen as disruptive and out of step, not following directions Intense concentration; long attention span; Neglects duties or people during periods of focus; resists persistence in areas of interest interruption; stubbornness Sensitivity, empathy; desire to be accepted by others Susceptible to criticism or peer rejection High energy, alertness, eagerness. Frustration with inactivity; may be seen as hyperactive Independent; prefers individualized work; reliant May reject parent or peer input; nonconformity; does not function well on self with group work Diverse interests and abilities; versatility May appear disorganized or scattered; frustrated over lack of time Strong sense of sophisticated humorPeers may misunderstand humor; may become "class clown” for attention • Adapted from Clark (1992) and Seagoe (1974) Source: ERIC Digest #E527

10. Asynchrony • What is asynchrony (or asynchronicity)? • “Not synchronized” • Gifted students are asynchronous in that their physical development (chronological age), intellectual development (intellectual abilities or mental age), and social/emotional development (social behaviors) do not develop equally at the same time. A seven year old gifted student in second grade may have an intellectual ability equivalent to a 10-year-old, and be able to read on a fifth grade level, but may behave like a six year old at times. • Just because a gifted student may have exceptional intellectual maturity does not mean that he always displays emotional maturity!

11. Stress points Greatest stress points and greatest potential need for counseling: • Early elementary school when asynchronicity is most striking and full-time programs are not available • Early adolescence/middle school due to possible achievement/affiliation conflicts • Points of transition from program to program, or after a change in placement, especially when the new program is more challenging than the old one, or involves significant changes in peer groups • College/career planning, due to multipotentialities • Highly gifted students in general education classes • Changes in family structure, particularly with a new step-parent who may not understand giftedness • Girls in middle school who may begin hiding their giftedness so as not to appear smarter than the boys

12. At-risk gifted students Gifted students who may need more counseling support: • Highly gifted students in general education classes • Twice-exceptional students • Underachievers • Gays and lesbians • Cultural or ethnic minorities • Students whose parents have limited education • Some researchers say that gifted writers and visual artists may be more at risk for mood disorders (Neihart & Olenchak, 2002)

13. Underachievement • Gifted students can be underachievers for a variety of reasons, including: • Wanting to hide their giftedness so as not to be different from their peers or social group • Different priorities than the teacher (“neatness” is generally not a priority for gifted students) • Frustration with lack of challenging material (“Why should I do this if I know it already?”) • Perfectionism • Deliberately failing is easier than admitting you don’t know something, because gifted students are supposed to know everything • Not all gifted students get As. • Not all straight-A students are gifted. • Gifted students are not always gifted in everything. For more information on underachievement, please see the social-emotional needs component of this project.

14. Issues with Self-Image Gifted students may have a poor self-image or low self-esteem due to: • Having an understanding of how little they do know compared to the world’s body of knowledge– they know how much they don’t know • Frustration that they cannot solve the world’s inequities and problems (supersensitivity to injustice) • Feeling out of place socially, intellectually • “Things were easy before; now they are difficult, so I must not be as smart as they said.” • Fear of loss of image if they reveal fear or self-doubt • Lack of validation from teachers (“If you are so smart, why can’t you figure it out by yourself?” “You couldn’t have done this by yourself; someone must have helped you.)” This can be extremely devastating to students!

15. Issues with Self-Image • Overly high expectations can be paralyzing (“There is no way I can get into Harvard, so I won’t even try”; “I would rather fail on purpose than try and then fail”) • Having to hide intelligence • So as to not appear conceited or arrogant • So as not to be teased: “teacher’s pet” or “know-it-all” or “smarty-pants” or “nerd” or “geek” • So as to fit in – you can’t use advanced vocabulary with peers who do not understand it • Cognitive dissonance – seeing but being unable to do anything about the “way things are” vs. the “way things ought to be” • Athletic honors are seen as more important/getting more recognition than academic honors; academic honors are less (and sometimes not at all) valued Intelligence is part of who you are… you should not have to hide your identity!

16. More Issues with Self-Image • Some teacher attitudes can have a long-lasting negative impact: • Teachers’ determination to keep gifted students “humble” • Teachers’ insecurity with having a student who knows more than they do • Teachers’ determination to show gifted students “they don’t know everything” • Teachers’ determination to make students “prove you are gifted” • Teachers who pick on gifted students when they make an error or forget something, telling them “You must not be so gifted after all because you made a mistake.” • Teachers’ attitude of “you’re gifted, you don’t need any help” defeats students who do need some help or guidance Yikes! Do you know a teacher with these attitudes? How do their students respond?

17. Automatic thoughts sometimes overrepresented in gifted students • Absolutistic thinking – experiencing or categorizing everything as two opposites with no “gray area” (good vs. evil, right vs. wrong) • “Imposter” phenomenon – worrying that own success is due to luck rather than ability; fear of being exposed as a fraud (not really being gifted) • Catastrophic thinking – worrying about irrational worst-case scenarios • Perfectionistic thinking – believing they are worthless or a failure if their accomplishments are not perfect • Effortlessness of others – believing that other gifted students achieve effortlessly in comparison to themselves; therefore they must not be gifted • Embarrassment about explicit learning – believing that if they are gifted, they should not need to study hard, although they do need to do so

18. Fixed vs. growth mindsets • Students (or teachers) with fixed mindsets may have difficulty moving forward when faced with challenging work; any criticism of the students’ capabilities or accomplishments becomes a criticism of the student’s self; rather than risk failing, the student may not even try • It is important to praise the work rather than the student (“your writing and ideas are excellent in this report”, not “you are so smart”) • For more information: http://michaelgr.com/2007/04/15/fixed-mindset-vs-growth-mindset-which-one-are-you/ Is ability something that is inborn and can be demonstrated, or something that can be developed?

19. Pressure… Barbara Kerr describes her experience as a gifted student in first grade: • “The purpose of gifted education, we were told, was to prepare “leaders of tomorrow.” We were told in no uncertain terms that we were expected to work much harder than other students, to aspire to high goals, and to seek leadership positions in our fields when we were grown.” That’s a lot of pressure on a first grader!

20. …and Fear • From a recent survey response posted by a gifted elementary student: “I’ve been scared sometimes when I get something wrong.” Why do you think a student might say this?

21. Dabrowski’s Theory of Positive Disintegration • Kazimierz Dabrowski, Polish psychologist • Identified five personality characteristics or intensities, which he called "overexcitabilities" or "supersensitivities," which affect the way a student experiences the world • Psychomotor oversensitivity • Sensual oversensitivity • Intellectual oversensitivity • Imaginational oversensitivity • Emotional oversensitivity

22. These students may have: • Higher than average response to stimuli • Reactions that are over and above average in intensity, duration and frequency • Not all gifted students have overexcitabilities, but there may be more people with overexcitabilities in the gifted population than in the average population • Children do not grow out of these supersensitivities. A child with intense emotional feelings will experience the same depth of emotion as an adult. • Emotional overexcitability is most commonly seen in gifted students

23. Emotional Overexcitability • The primary manifestation of this intensity is exceptional emotional sensitivity. • These students have great emotional depth and strong attachments to people, places, and things. There is a deep concern for others, but they may also have intense self-criticism and anxiety. • They may be accused of being melodramatic or overreacting, but these emotions are very real for them. • Telling an emotionally intense child to ignore teasing or not let the teasing bother him is impossible advice for the child to follow.

24. Emotional Overexcitability • They may have strong sense of responsibility, but that may also create stress and anxiety or feelings of failure and guilt. • These students may experience existential depression (depression over basic concerns about death, poverty, homelessness, war, diseases, etc.) • These students may have intense empathy for others, including animals, and may choose to be vegetarians. • They may have an acute sense of justice/injustice “It’s not fair!”

25. Emotional Overexcitability • Heightened sense right and wrong, of injustice and hypocrisy • Problems adjusting to change • Depression • Need for security • Physical response to emotions (stomach aches caused by anxiety, for example) • Extremes of emotion • Anxiety • Feelings of guilt and sense of responsibility • Feelings of inadequacy and inferiority • Timidity and shyness • Loneliness • Concern for others, empathy • Strong memory for feelings

26. Counseling strategies for all overexcitabilities • Help students develop strategies for recognizing stress reactions and coping with stress • Help students understand their own behaviors and how their behaviors impact others • The emotions of these students are real. Your molehills really are their mountains. • For more information on oversensitivities, please refer to the social/emotional component of the competencies project.

27. Family issues • Parents of gifted children are often unable to talk about their experiences with parents of average ability children (“Your child gets straight A’s – why should you be worrying?”) • Parents may worry about common gifted characteristics including perceived bossiness, difficulties with peer relationships, intense dreams and nightmares, oversensitivity, or acute sense of social injustice • Parents need to share with other parents of gifted children to understand what is normal, and to get ideas on how to support and advocate for their children

28. Family issues, cont. • Parents may have concerns about “fairness” when one sibling is eligible for special programs and the other sibling is not; parents of twins may be especially concerned about inequalities • Parents may put intense pressure on gifted students to fulfill the parents’ dreams (“My brilliant daughter will be a brain surgeon!”) • Students may feel that their parents value them only for their giftedness, and consequently they become terrified of failing or making mistakes

29. Providing support for parents • Establish an environment where counselors or other facilitators can provide support, guidance, and information • Increase parents’ understanding of the gifted student’s emotional needs • Provide materials and resources as needed: • Information on characteristics of gifted students • Information on summer programs, competitions, and other opportunities for gifted students • Books, articles and brochures on parenting gifted students or on gifted issues • Organizations and websites with relevant information • Referrals for professional help if needed • Encourage parental involvement in their students’ education and how to advocate for them effectively • Understand – it is not easy to raise a highly gifted child!

30. Counseling for college and careers • Multipotentialities! Gifted students tend to be good at many things, and to have many interests. This means that they may also have a great deal of difficulty in planning for their futures – art school or medical school? Archaeologist or engineer? These students may need to start their planning early, and leave in options for changes. • Course counseling at the middle school level should focus on making sure that the student takes the most rigorous coursesavailable, especially in math. • Middle school counselors should also make sure that students are clearly aware of the many options available to them in high school, and know what the requirements are for each option.Students must have the prerequisites needed for multiple options in high school (including AP, IB, and Governor’s School).

31. Counseling for college and careers, cont. • Course counseling at the high school level should focus on making sure the student “keeps doors open” in case interests change; in making sure the student is prepared for top tier colleges; and in making sure that the student understands that top tier colleges are a possibility (provide specific, extensive information on financial aid). • Choices such as Early College Scholars, dual enrollment, Advanced Placement courses, and Virtual Virginia courses should all be discussed, as well as Governor’s Schools and IB, to give students as many options as possible. • Counselors should also help students learn to “play the game” even when they are disenchanted or bored, because teacher recommendations and grades from high school can have a huge impact on the students’ opportunities later. • For more information, see the academically gifted student section in the College (Planning) Handbook posted on the gifted web page at http://www.sbo.hampton.k12.va.us/departments/gifted/gifted.html

32. A word on Governor’s Schools • Governor’s Schools in Virginia were designed to help meet the needs of gifted students. They can be truly life-changing experiences. (“There are other students like me, who think like I do!”) • Counselors should make sure the students have information about the Summer Residential Governor’s School programs as well as the academic year programs. • For more information, check out the tabs on the HCS gifted website at http://www.sbo.hampton.k12.va.us/departments/gifted/gifted.html • Start early to generate interest… “Someday if you get to go to Governor’s School, you will be able to……..”

33. Scheduling… • Gifted students may be reluctant to choose advanced level or honors courses for a number of reasons, including: • Not wanting to be different from classmates, friends, or neighbors • Middle school girls may not want to appear smarter than the boys • Fear of failure – if the work was easy before, but will be harder now, maybe I’m not smart anymore? • Sometimes choosing to fail is easier than admitting you don’t know how to do something • Playing ball or video games after school is more fun than doing honors homework • General rebelliousness These are not adequate reasons for opting out of advanced classes! • The schedule should fit the students’ needs–don’t keep a student out of an advanced math class or Honors English just because it does not conveniently fit the schedule. Make it work! It’s up to counselors to help keep these students in appropriate courses.

34. …and Overscheduling • Some gifted high achievers just want to take an overload of extra courses, and be on every team, and be in every club. They are passionate about everything. • Remember that gifted students need time to think, too. • College admissions officers are now often looking more for a student’s commitment to an area of passion than at well-roundedness. You may need to help students find an area of focus. Multipotentialities again!

35. How can counselors help? • Have an understanding of the theoretical base and characteristics of giftedness • Understand asynchonicity and oversensitivities • Be aware of the support services available (organizations, bibliographies, support groups, online resources) • Ask for help or additional information if needed • Be mindful of personal value structures and tolerance when presented with “divergent” behavior • Be an advocate for gifted education

36. School counselors should not say… This student belongs in the gifted program. This student gets all A’s, so she should be in the gifted program. • School divisions have very specific criteria for gifted identification. A student may be a very high achiever, or show some evidence of giftedness, but may not be eligible for identification. It is better to tell parents “Your child has excellent skills in…. and you should consider referring the child for possible identification.” It is quite problematic when a student does not meet the criteria and the parent complains “But [ ] said she was gifted!” Since your student is bored in school, he should be tested for the gifted program. • It is the responsibility of every classroom teacher to meet the educational needs of the students, making the curriculum rigorous and relevant for everyone. The teacher should consider using various differentiation strategies to challenge the more advanced students. The gifted specialist can provide you with more information.

37. School counselors should not say… The teacher says this student does not do her work, and she gets poor grades, so I don’t think she really is gifted. I will not send in your referral form. • All referral forms MUST be sent to the eligibility committee. All eligibility decisions are made at the division level, not at the school level. • Not all identified gifted students are high achievers. Some students may be gifted in very specific intellectual areas, such as quantitative or non-verbal reasoning. Gifted students may also be underachievers for a variety of social/emotional reasons. Your gifted resource specialist can give you more insight into the needs of these students. Your child missed the eligibility cutoff by two points. • Each point on an eligibility matrix is based on a range of scores, so a score of 8 (out of 10) on the matrix might indicate that the child was in the 85th percentile on an ability test instead of the 95th percentile, or that the teacher gave the child a rating in the bottom range of points instead of in the top range of points, or that the grades were below a “C” average, or a combination of these factors. If a student had scored at the 94th percentile and needed a 95th percentile for eligibility, with all other criteria being at the highest level, we would certainly have given the student another test to make sure that our decision was appropriate! If you have questions about how to interpret the eligibility results, please contact the gifted director or your gifted specialist, or have the parent call to discuss it with us.

38. School counselors should not say… The teachers in my building do not want the students to miss their classes in order to go to gifted classes, or to gifted art classes, so we are not sending in any referrals. • Yikes! We are mandated by law to provide these services. Would you deny mandated services to a special education student? Or tell Michael Jordan that he could not have gym class, or tell Yo-Yo Ma that he could not have music lessons? Please do not deny your students the services they need and/or may be eligible for!! All children are gifted, and since we do not want to miss anyone, we will just refer all of the students. • Although we do not want to miss any potentially gifted students, we also do not want to put students through unnecessary testing, which can be quite stressful; nor do we want to mislead parents. Remember, we do look at every student in the division through the screening process.

39. Help us find these diamonds in the rough! There are many cultural differences in the way gifted students show evidence of their talents. We are looking for evidence of critical thinking, abstract reasoning, and intellectual creativity. • Does this student ask thoughtful questions? • Does this student give creative, insightful, or unusual responses? • Does this student provide interesting details or seem unusually observant? • Is this student good at seeing relationships, connections, and “the big picture”? • Does this student have a large vocabulary or just seem to know a lot of information? • Is this student ESL, but is learning English (and the nuances of the language) very quickly? • Does this student rarely do homework or turn in assignments, but still seems to understand the material? Refer this student!

40. Resources Websites: • VA Department of Education, Gifted Education and Governor’s Schools: 
http://www.doe.virginia.gov/VDOE/Instruction/Gifted/gifted.htm • Virginia Association for the Gifted:  http://www.vagifted.org • National Association for Gifted Children:  http://www.nagc.org • The Center for Gifted Education, The College of William and Mary:  http://www.cfge.wm.edu • Johns Hopkins Center for Talented Youth:  http://www.cty.jhu.edu • SENG – Supporting Emotional Needs of the Gifted:  http://www.sengifted.org • Hoagies' Gifted Education Homepage: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org • Council for Exceptional Children (includes gifted) www.cec.sped.org • Neag Center for Gifted Education http://www.gifted.uconn.edu/parents/parentrp.html Books: • (a good source of books is Prufrock Press at http://www.prufrock.com/

41. References • Boland, C. M. & Gross, M. U. (2007). Counseling highly gifted children and adolescents. In S. Mendaglio & J. S. Peterson (Eds.), Models of counseling: Gifted children, adolescents, and adults, 153-194. Waco, TX: Prufrock Press. • Cross and Cross. (2011) Handb0ok for Counselors Serving Students with Gifts and Talents. Prufrock Press. • Devries, A. R. & Webb, J.T. (2007). Gifted parent groups: The SENG model, 2nd edition. Scottsdale, AZ: Great Potential Press • Mendaglio, S. (2008). Dabrowski’s theory of positive disintegration: A personality theory for the 21st century. In S. Mendaglio (Ed.), Dabrowski’s theory of positive disintegration, pp. 13-14.Scottsdale, AZ: Great Potential Press. • Moon, S. (2007). Counseling issues and research. In S. Mendaglio & J. S. Peterson (Eds.), Models of counseling: Gifted children, adolescents, and adults, pp. 7-27. Waco, TX: Prufrock Press. • Moon, S. M. (2002). Counseling needs and strategies. In M. Neihart, S. M. Reiss, N. M. Robinson, & S. M. Moon, (Eds.), The social and emotional development of gifted children: What do we know?, pp. 213-222. Waco, TX: Prufrock Press • Neihart, M. (2002). Gifted children and depression. In M. Neihart, S. M. Reiss, N. M. Robinson, & S. M. Moon, (Eds.), The social and emotional development of gifted children: What do we know?, pp. 93-103. Waco, TX: Prufrock Press • Robinson, N. (2002). Introduction. In M. Neihart, S. M. Reiss, N. M. Robinson, & S. M. Moon, (Eds.), The social and emotional development of gifted children: What do we know?, p. xi. Waco, TX: Prufrock Press. • Webb, J.T., Amend, E. R., Webb, N.E., Goerss, J., Beljan, P., & Olenchak, F. R. (2005). Misdiagnosis and dual diagnosis of gifted children and adults. Scottsdale, AZ: Great Potential Press. • Counselingthe Gifted Student. Pam Clark, Ph.D., LMFT. Converse College.

42. Reflection and Discussion Questions • How is counseling gifted students different from counseling general education students? • How will your counseling strategies change as a result of what you learned in this component? • How are gifted students like galaxies?

43. Post-Assessment • What are three things you learned about counseling gifted students? • What are two ways you can connect these ideas and strategies to your existing professional ideas and strategies? • What is one burning question or need that you have?