REALITY THERAPY in SCHOOL

1. REALITY THERAPY in SCHOOL CHOICE THEORY

2. Reality • We live in a world we can See, Hear, Touch, Taste, Smell. • We call it the real world or reality • No two people perceive the world the same • Parent ……. child • Optimist …… pessimist • Sane ……… insane • We all live in the same world, but each person sees it differently.

3. CHOICE THEORY & REALITY THERAPY • Choice • Control • Behavior • Reality • My Personal World • Taking Responsibility

4. Behavior • You control every behavior. • You have a choice to behave or not. • Every behavior has a purpose. • Even doing nothing is a choice. • We cannot make anyone do anything he/she doesn’t want to do. • Individuals choose behaviors!

5. Choice • The only behavior we can control is our own. • When choices are made, people discover the result attained is desirable or undesirable. • Choice is not caused by outside forces. • Choice Worksheet • List five choices you made at home and school • Good choice (+); Bad choice (-) • How many good choices? How many bad choices? • What did you learn? • Complete the sentences.

6. My Personal Picture Album • My personal world – Wants • Group of pictures • Create and recreate. • Contains pictures that are most important to you. • We organize these pictures into three categories: • The people we most want to be with. • The things we most want to own or experience. • The ideas of beliefs that control our behavior.

7. How it works • Personal world – How Does it Work worksheet • Remember the last holiday or your birthday and a gift you wanted and write on the first blank. • Did you get the gift? • How did you feel? • Anytime we feel good - we are choosing to behave so someone, something or some belief in the real world comes close to matching a picture of our personal world. • Anytime we succeed at satisfying a picture – we feel good. • Anytime we fail - we feel pain.

8. First Step • What are the pictures in your child/student’s personal world? • School – achievements, behavior, attendance • Family/friends – relationships • Hobbies/extracurricular activities • We order, rank, make decisions based on those pictures. • Parents/Teachers need to understand the pictures in their child/student’s world. • Parents/Teachers must: • Know their child/student’s personal reality • Listen and don’t judge • Link child/student’s personal world to goals and wants in the home or school is important

9. Personal World • My Personal World • What are the pictures in your personal picture album? • Personal World Worksheet • When I think of _____ I see… • Describe the pictures in one area? • School • A class • This school year • Be specific • Be honest • Your pictures guide your behavior • Share with your parents

10. Quality World • Pictures are removable, changeable, adjustable and replaceable. • Some pictures are realistic; others are unrealistic. • Pictures exist in priority. • Pictures can be in conflict. • Good relationships are built by sharing common pictures. • The pictures of an individual make sense to that individual.

11. Take responsibility • Change behavior • Get what I want • Be happy and successful

12. WDEP • Teaching tool useful for understanding and teaching: • Responsibility • Control • Choice • Self-evaluation • W - wants • D – Do and Direction • E – Evaluation • P – Plan

13. W - Wants • Asking the student what does he/she wants? • Exploration • What do you want for? • School • Yourself • Career • How hard do you want to work at solving the problem? (commitment) • What are you trying to avoid? (fear) • How do you perceive your control of the problem? (perception)

14. Level of Commitment • “I don’t want to be here. Leave me alone.” No commitment • “I want the outcome, but I don’t want to make the effort.” More of a wish than intense desire • “I’ll try” or “Maybe” Middle level of commitment – willing to make a change. “To try” allows room for excuses and failure.

15. Level of Commitment • “I will do my best.” Higher level of commitment and the beginning of action planning, yet it still contains an escape hatch for failure. • “I will do whatever it takes.” Highest level of commitment; person is willing to make choices and produce the desired results.

16. W – Want • What do you want? • Students • What do you want for school? • Write your answers on My Achievement Plan sheet

17. D –Direction and Doing • Asking the student, “Are you headed in the direction you want to be?” • Goal is to help students understand they are choosing their path. • Asking the student, “What are you doing?” • What – specifically (time, amount, etc.) • Are – current or resent behaviors • You – controllables – the student behavior • No one changes behavior unless a judgment is first made that current behaviors are not helpful.

18. D- Direction and Doing • Students will explore: • D – Direction and doing • What are you doing? • What direction are you going? • List behaviors • Be specific • How often • Write the behaviors on second line (long line).

19. E- Self-Evaluation • Help the students make judgments about their behavior. • Is the behavior, choices, beliefs, feelings: • Helpful or hurtful • Useful or useless • Significant or meaningless • Effective of ineffective • Acceptable or unacceptable • Evaluate the want: • Obtainable or unobtainable • Beneficial or harmful • Highly desirable or mere wishes

20. E- Self-Evaluation • Students do not change until they decide what they are doing doesn’t help them accomplish what they want. • Is the behavior adding to or subtracting from what the student wants? • Self-Evaluation • Students make judgments on what they are doing. • Is this helping or hurting? • Put a plus sign (+) if the behavior is helping or minus sign (-) beside the behavior if it is hurting.

21. P - Plan • What is your plan for change? • Effective plans • Best plan: initiated by student. • Second best plan: initiated by student and school counselor/parent. • Third best plan: initiated by parent/school counselor • Only works if students accept that their current behavior is not working.

22. Plans • What if the student fails to follow through on the plan? • Student has not judged that their current behavior is ineffective. • “If you don’t follow through, will anything change? • Ask the student to experiment with the plan and try it for a week. • Try to do something for a limited amount of time. “Try it for 30 minutes.” • Focus on temporary change, and then determine if it is worth the effort to continue.

23. Put it all together • With your school counselor you will review: • What you want, • What you are doing, • How is it working for you, and • Create a plan. Use the Protection Plan worksheet to help you determine if you have a good plan.

24. SCHOOL COUNSELING ACTIVITIES IN REALITY THERAPY

25. Total BehaviorOur Best Attempt to Satisfy Our Needs • DOING – active behaviors • THINKING – thoughts, self-statements • FEELINGS – anger, joy, pain, anxiety • PHYSIOLOGY – bodily reactions

26. CASE SCENARIO – BEHAVORIAL CAR • Casey – 12th Grader • Casey is sent to your office because she has been unable to take her high school graduation test (after attempting to do so since 11th grade). Her last time to take it in order to graduate with her class is quickly approaching. • She shared with her school counselor that she has anxiety or panic attacks every time she has to take the test. • After describing what happens each time she has attempted to take the test, her school counselor decides to use Glasser’s behavioral care to help her understand her anxiety attack and how to overcome it.

27. GLASSER’S BEHAVIORAL CAR Feeling Physiology Acting Thinking The 4 wheels on the car describe a person’s total behavior. In order for the car to move, the four wheels have to move together. It is the same for a person to display any behavior, all four components are present and work simultaneously.

28. CASE SCENARIO – BEHAVORIAL CAR • The Explanation of Test Anxiety using Glasser’s BC: • Casey knows (thinking) that it is time to take out the pencil to begin the test, so she starts to feel a quiver in her stomach (physiology); this makes her afraid (feeling) that she might be sick all over the desk and her test papers, so she runs out of the classroom to the bathroom (acting). • When followed by a friend (sent by the teacher), she states that she is having a test anxiety attach and she will not take the test today (total behavior).

29. CASE SCENARIO – CLIENT ACTIVITY CHART The circle drawn shows the client’s perception of the amount of time he spends participating in the various activities. This particular student shows that he is spending equal time in all areas and therefore is feeling satisfied that his basic needs (quality world) are being met. The circle’s placement of equal portion in each activity is the desired goal or behaviors of counseling.

30. CASE SCENARIO – CLIENT ACTIVITY CHART • Ty – 8th Grader • Ty was flagged as a potential repeater so you have asked him to meet with you to discuss his study habits and his first term grades. • He failed most of his subjects including language arts, mathematics, and science. • Ty is popular and one of the star basketball players. • You have him complete a client activity chart in using reality therapy to work with him.

31. CASE SCENARIO – CLIENT ACTIVITY CHART Describe the counseling issue for this client. How might you help him with Reality Therapy?

32. CASE SCENARIO – CLIENT ACTIVITY CHART • His circle indicates that he perceives himself as not having much worth or power in academics because of the failing grades but having a large sense of belonging (he knows that he is loved by his family and he also has many friends), with lots of variety (fun, freedom, physiology) activities in his life (he is actively involved in extracurricular activities that are sports and non-sports related).

33. CASE SCENARIO – USING A PATHOGRAM

34. CASE SCENARIO – USING A PATHOGRAM • A student in counseling will draw a vertical line in each column indicating on a 1-10 scale his/her perception of the level of each need being met satisfactorily. • A number 1 indicates a low level of satisfaction (dissatisfaction) and a 10 being very satisfied (happy).

35. CASE SCENARIO – USING A PATHOGRAM • Jeremy – 4th grader • Jeremy would need to see the school counselor. Why?

36. CASE SCENARIO – USING A PATHOGRAM • Jeremy – 4th grader • Jeremy indicates that he sees himself as being very low on feeling a sense of belonging or love (the 2 represents his mother’s love); • He sees himself even lower in self-worth or having a sense of achievement (he has repeated a grade and has been placed in a higher grade because of his age); • Jeremy has no friends so there is no fun in his life (“life is boring”);

37. CASE SCENARIO – USING A PATHOGRAM • Jeremy – 4th grader • Jeremy feels like he has a lot of freedom because his mother allows him to do whatever he wants and comes home when ever he wants to; • Since “life is so boring” he believes that his physiology is fairly low because there is not much to do other than play video games whether he is at home or hanging out with friends. • He describes his life as doing the “the same ole same ole.” • How would you proceed with Jeremy in counseling?

38. Glasser's Reality Therapy • Two Assumptions: • A. Need to love and be loved • B. To be worthwhile as a person • Three Approaches: • A. Involvement • B. Rejection of unrealistic behavior • C. Relearning realistic or new behaviors • How might you work with a student who wants to get out of gang/delinquent behaviors?

39. “People change when they evaluate their own behavior and develop and implement specific plans.” (adapted from Wubbolding, 2000)