190 likes | 377 Views
Top 10 Writing Mistakes Students Make. Or things to avoid that will make your writing weaker. #10 . Not digging deep enough/ assuming things are clear to your reader when they aren’t. Examples: Granny’s Closet is a great restaurant because of their customer service.
E N D
Top 10 Writing Mistakes Students Make Or things to avoid that will make your writing weaker
#10 • Not digging deep enough/ assuming things are clear to your reader when they aren’t. • Examples: • Granny’s Closet is a great restaurant because of their customer service. • -Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” is a beautiful painting that uses color effectively. • Most people are dressed casually at this establishment. • - What don’t these statements tell you? How can we make re-write these and make them stronger?
Granny’s closet demonstrates its excellent customer service by their close attention to customer’s food preferences. • Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” uses a myriad of colors to replicate the beauty that people feel when they see a starry sky. Dark blues, blacks, and yellow are the predominant colors… • At Black Bart’s people are often attired in khaki shorts, sandals that Jesus might have worn, and button down polo shirts. No ties are worn at Bart’s.
#9 • Not analyzing quotes • Martin Luther King states “ I have a dream that my four little children will one day be judged not by their skin, but by the content of their character”(1). Martin Luther king is a great speaker who really motivates people to look beyond superficial qualities. • How can this be better?
Martin Luther king makes a plea to his audience not be overly focused on outer superficialities, such as skin color, but to be more concerned with who a person is, as demonstrated by their actions.
#8 Asking your audience obvious questions/or questions you need to answer. Example: Why do we continue to eat fast food when we know its bad for us? Example: Imagine you’ve lost multiple valuable items, you accuse another of stealing your possessions and there is no chance that you simply misplaced them yourself. Imagine someone tells you they witnessed this person steal your items, than another person tells you that they witnessed a different person steal your items. Who do you believe? How could there be two different stories? What’s the problem here? How can we change these questions to sound better/ or eliminate them altogether?
Often, we eat fast food, which is unhealthy, despite knowing that is bad for us. So what is the motivation behind this?/ The motivation behind this is….. • When stealing occurs there is often uncertainty about what happened, even if there are eyewitnesses who claim to have seen a theft….
#7 • Over-summarizing • Example: The Titanic is a powerful film that tells the story of Rose Dawson and Jack, last name unknown. This story is basically about two people that fall in love and die on the Titanic. Jack and Rose are from two different sides of the track, Rose is rich, while Jack is poor. This gives the story a nice backdrop, as people are very interested in romantic stories. Also both Kate Winslet and the film won Academy Awards. My criteria for evaluating this film are the actors, the setting (the boat), and the music. • How much background info is too much? What kind of background information would be relevant here?
The Titanic was one of the most popular, highest grossing films of the nineties. It’s main plot follows the love story of Rose Dawson and Jack. Set on the backdrop of a sinking boat, the plot unfolds dramatically, with director James Cameron using flashbacks and a web of interconnected characters to illustrate the tragedy of both doomed love and a boat destined to fail.
#6 • Not providing specific examples • Kate Winslet is easily the best actress in Titanic. From start to finish she is magical, making the audience really believe that she is an aristocrat and that her and Jack’s love is real. Not only that but she really makes the audience aware of how seriously depressed she is about being rich and having no options in life. This shows throughout the whole movie, as judged by her emotions. • What is a scene that we could use to connect back to make this paragraph stronger?
#5 • Not supporting your claims • Example: While, I’m sure innocent citizens are often convicted of crimes they have not committed, there is at least twice as many people who have committed a crime and gotten away with it. – Amy fact. • If it’s factual it must be cited. If you are not sure of the source, how can you reword this to make it less egregious?
Although innocent people may be convicted, it seems likely that some people who are guilty may be let go. • While approximately 3% of convicted felons are later exonerated by DNA evidence, roughly 10% of defendants are acquitted on mis-trial charges- (justice.com)
#4 • Closely related to #5- overstating your case. • Example: Forrest Gump is a movie that succeeds on every possible level. It’s a classic tale of how one man overcomes his difficulties in life and really shows what is possible. • Example: This speech flat out convinces its audience that there is no possible way to support racism.
#3 • Giving away your authority • Example: I’m no expert, but I think Twilight is a great book. • Example: Although I seldom review movies, I do enjoy watching them. • Example: It’s my opinion that the author thinks we are too invested in technology.
Twilight is a good book for the following reasons, it captures the audiences attention immediately, it has a clear voice and the plot line is easy to follow…. • Movies can be evaluated on many criteria, the criteria I usually choose is…. • For the most part, there are exceptions, avoid in my opinion unless you are very confident it makes sense in the context.
#2 • Too many ideas (also ideas not related to thesis) • Tom Hanks is the star of Forrest Gump, and his portrayal of Forrest, especially in the scene where he tells Jenny that he loves her, reveals Tom Hank’s true character. Also, when he goes to war and meets Bubba and helps him with shrimping, this shows that Forrest is man who can be trusted. Finally when he comes home when his mom is sick, it tells the audience everything they need to know about Forrest- that he is the kind of person that will never abandon a friend.
Example: Martin Luther King is a powerful speaker and great man. • Example: General Douglas McArthur is an inspiration to millions of soldiers. • Example: _____ is a movie that really connects with its audience, and does a great job of showing the truth.