7 Habits of Highly Effective

1. 7 Habits of Highly Effective TEENS

2. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Proactive people: • are not easily offended. • take responsibility for their choices. • think before they act. • bounce back when something bad happens to them. • always find a way to make it happen. • focus on things they can do something about, and don’t worry about things they can’t.

3. Habit #1: Be Proactive • On a computer, create a collage with a picture of yourself in the middle. • Put yourself in a situation you see yourself in 10 years. Where are you? Who is around you? • In the background, include all the things that you hope to achieve within 10 years. • Below the picture, list five (5) positive attributes you possess as a proactive person.

4. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Turn Setbacks into Triumphs • Describe how you would turn a setback into a triumph for each of the following scenarios: • You and your best friend scope out others in the lunchroom every day. You point out to your friend a person that you would like to get to know better. The next day your friend tells you that he or she called and asked that person out last night.

5. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Turn Setbacks into Triumphs • Describe how you would turn a setback into a triumph for each of the following scenarios: • The prom is next week. You and your friends are planning on going with a large group in limo and hanging out all night. You’ve been looking forward to it all year. The day before the prom, you fall and break your leg and have a full-leg cast.

6. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Turn Setbacks into Triumphs • Describe how you would turn a setback into a triumph for each of the following scenarios: • You are working a job after school to make the monthly payments, insurance, and gas for a car. For six months, you’ve been saving up for a car stereo. On your way home from work one night you are daydreaming and you get pulled over by the police. The speeding ticket is the same amount as you’ve saved for the stereo.

7. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Turn Setbacks into Triumphs • A setback I experienced or am currently experiencing is: • I could have turned or can turn that setback into a triumph by:

8. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Become a Change Agent • One habit that has been passed down to me that I would like to change or improve is: • The history of that bad habit is: (Describe where it came from and how it has affected your family’s life.) • This bad habit has affected my life in these ways:

9. Habit #1: Be Proactive • Become a Change Agent • By changing that bad habit, my life will be different in these ways: • To change that bad habit, I can do the following every day: (Describe your actions.)

10. Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind • Crossroads of Life: Schoolwork • Drop out or stay in school? Do as little work as possible and just get by? Begin scholarship applications today or put them off? Decide on a college or have someone decide for you?

11. Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind • Crossroads of Life: Schoolwork • Drop out or stay in school? Do as little work as possible and just get by? Begin scholarship applications today or put them off? Decide on a college or have someone decide for you?

12. Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind • Crossroads of Life: Sex • Have sex or abstain? Cave in to pressure from your boyfriend or girlfriend? Not have sex at all, but talk as if you do?

13. Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind • Crossroads of Life: Drugs and Alcohol • Take drugs and alcohol or not? Experiment or not? Cave in to peer pressure or not? Drink and drive or be the designated driver? Not do drugs but talk as if you do? Smoke or not? Assist others in taking drugs or buying alcohol?

14. Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind • Crossroads of Life: Friends • Do your friends share your morals? Will you go to school with your friends? Will your friends support your decision to leave home or will they encourage you to stay here?

15. Habit #3: Put First Things First • How Do You Spend Your Time? • (Never = 1, Sometimes=3, Always = 5) • How often during your typical day do you fix problems? • How often during your typical day do you work to improve your study skills? • How often during your typical day do drop what you’re doing to hang out with friends who call or stop by? • How often during your typical daydo you watch TV, play video games, or surf the Web?

16. Habit #3: Put First Things First • How Do You Spend Your Time? • (Never = 1, Sometimes = 3, Always = 5) 5. How often during your typical day do you deal with emergencies? 6. How often during your typical day do you spend time with your siblings or other family members? 7. How often during your typical day do you do things other people want you to do? 8. How often during your typical daydo you hang out and chat?

18. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 1: Procrastinator (Urgent and Important) • Do you grab fast food or skip meals because you don’t have time? • Do you cram for tests the night before? • Do you write essays the night before they are due? • Are you the type of person who is not good at planning or organizing? • Do you have trouble getting motivated without pressure?

19. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 1: Procrastinator • Do you frequently become preoccupied with one thing while you are doing something else? • Do you feel frustrated by the slowness of people and things around you? • Do you hate to wait or stand in line? • Do you seem to rush between places and events?

20. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 1: Procrastinator • Do you rarely have time for yourself? • Do you frequently wish you had thought about things and acted sooner? • Do you miss friends’ and family birthdays? • Do you frequently miss or are late for assignments or appointments?

21. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 3: The Yes-Man (Urgent and Not Important) • Typically try to please others and have a hard time saying “No” • These people lack self-discipline.

22. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 3: The Yes-Man • To fill your precious time with worthwhile activities, you need to identify your most important priorities. • List two of your highest priorities on the left side, then on the right side, list the activities you will turn down to fulfill that priority.

23. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 4: The Slacker (Not Urgent and Not Important) • Too much TV, too much sleep. • Endless phone calls • Excessive computer games • Mall marathons • Time wasters

24. Habit #3: Put First Things First • Quadrant 2: The Prioritizer (Not Urgent and Important) • You want to spend your time in this zone. • Planning, goal-setting • Essay due in a week • Exercise • Relationships • Relaxation

26. Habit #4: Think Win-Win • Win-Lose: Totem Pole • Use people, emotionally or physically for their selfish purposes. • Try to get ahead at the expense of others • Spread rumours about others. • Concentrate on getting their own way without considering others’ feelings. • Become jealous and envious when something good happens to someone else. • Describe a situation when you had a Win-Lose attitude.

27. Habit #4: Think Win-Win • Lose-Win: The Doormat • Set low expectations for themselves. • Have low self-esteem and never consider themselves worthy or good enough. • Compromise their standards over and over again. • Give in to peer pressure. • Allow themselves to be walked on with the excuse of being the “peacemaker” • Describe a situation when you had a Lose-Win attitude.

28. Habit #4: Think Win-Win • Lose-Lose: Downward Spiral • Seek revenge • Desire to win at all costs. • Obsessed with others in a negative way • Have co-dependent and emotionally damaging relationships. • Describe a situation when you had a Lose-Lose attitude.

29. Habit #4: Think Win-Win • Win-Win: The All-You-Can-Eat-Buffet • Help others succeed. • Happy when others succeed. • Think “abundance” • Willing to share the recognition with others • See life as an all-you-can-eat buffet for everybody. • Describe a situation when you had a Win-Win attitude.

30. Habit #4: Think Win-Win • Win-Win: The All-You-Can-Eat-Buffet • It is hardest for me to think Win-Win when... • It is easiest for me to think Win-Win when… • Five ways that I can apply Win-Win thinking in my relationships…

32. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood • You Have Two Ears and One Mouth! • Two or three things I wish my parents understood about me are… • Two or three things I wish my siblings understood about me are… • Two or three things I wish my friends understood about me are… • Two or three things I wish my teachers understood about me are…

33. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood • The Deepest Need of the Human Heart! • Someone I know who is struggling with a problem is… • How can I make him or her feel comfortable, accepted, and understood around me?

34. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Poor Listening Skills: Spacing Out • Someone is talking to you, but you ignore him or her because your mind is elsewhere. • I find myself doing this to someone often. True or false? • If true, when? And who is that person?

35. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Poor Listening Skills: Pretend Listening • You’re not paying attention to the person talking, but you pretend you are. • When you think the person wants a response, you say, “Uh-huh, yeah, hmmm” • I find myself doing this to someone often. True or false? • If true, when? And who is that person?

36. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Poor Listening Skills: Selective Listening • You pay attention only to the part of the conversation that interests you or relates to you. You focus on specific words and then go off on your own conversation rather than listening to what the other person is trying to tell you. • I find myself doing this to someone often. True or false? • If true, when? And who is that person?

37. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Poor Listening Skills: Word Listening • You pay attention to the words, but you miss the point because you’re ignoring the tone, feelings, and body language. When you focus on words only, you miss the deeper emotions in someone’s heart. • I find myself doing this to someone often. True or false? • If true, when? And who is that person?

38. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Poor Listening Skills: Self-Centered Listening • You apply everything you hear to your own point of view. This is where some people play the one-upmanship game: “If you think your day was bad, wait until I tell you about my day.” • I find myself doing this to someone often. True or false? • If true, when? And who is that person?

39. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Genuine Listening: Listen with Your Eyes, Heart and Ears • If you want to understand what people are really saying, you need to listen with your eyes, your heart, and your ears. • Don’t just pay attention to the words they are saying, watch their body language, hear their tone, and sense how they are feeling.

40. Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood Genuine Listening: Stand in Their Shoes • If you want to understand someone, try looking at things from his or her perspective. • Be willing to stand in someone else’s shoes to see things from a different point of view.

42. Habit #6: Synergize Celebrate Diversity • When you celebrate diversity—not just tolerate differences—you co-operate with others to achieve your goal. • How do you celebrate differences in: • Race • Gender • Religion • Age • Body Type • Abilities/Disabilities

43. Habit #6: Synergize Respect Differing Viewpoints • Once you understand that everyone views the world differently and that everyone can be right, you have more respect for differing viewpoints. • What is your dominant character trait? • What is your strongest natural ability?

44. Habit #6: Synergize Avoid Roadblocks to Celebrating Differences • Ignorance • Not knowing how other people think, what they believe, or how they feel. • Cliques • Wanting to be with those you’re comfortable with, becomes exclusive and rejects others. • Prejudice • Not treating people fairly, which includes stereotyping, labeling, or prejudging others because they differ from your own circumstances.

45. Habit #6: Synergize Getting to Diversity • DEFINE the problem or opportunity • THEIR WAY (Seek first to understand.) • MY WAY (Seek to be understood.) • BRAINSTORM (Create new options and ideas.) • HIGH WAY (Find the best solutions.)

46. Habit #6: Synergize Teamwork and Synergy • Who can you count on: • to help you with homework? • for a good meal that lifts your day? • to answer your questions about life? • to help plan an activity or party? • to know your deepest thoughts? • to keep a secret? • to come up with the best music for a dance? • to help you clean the yard or house? • to shop with you and give you good ideas? • to help you plan your education? • to always love you and build you up?

48. Habit #7: Sharpen the Saw Balance is Better • Keep your personal self sharp so you can better deal with life. To perform at your peak, you need to pay attention to all four dimensions: Body, Brain, Heart, and Soul • How do you renew your body? • How do you renew your brain? • How do you renew your heart? • How do you renew your soul?

49. Habit #7: Sharpen the Saw Take Time for a Time-Out • Just like a car, you need regular tune-ups to run at your best. You need time to rejuvenate and rest. You need time to relax. Treat yourself to a little pampering. • List ten (10) things that you can do to take a time-out.

50. Habit #7: Sharpen the Saw Care for Your Body • Your body—that ever-changing, hormonal machine– is a tool, and if you take good care of it, it will serve you well. • Access you physical wellness: • Do you exercise 20-30 minutes at least three times a week? • Do you include cardiovascular and flexibility activities in my exercises? • Do you get the right amount of sleep? • Do you eat healthy foods? • Do you eat fast food more than twice a week? • Do you deal with stress effectively?