Complex Trauma

1. Complex Trauma

2. Recent research has happened has helped make sense of many problems we deal with in our culture and in understanding addiction • I think it is very important realization • It is Complex Trauma • It helps explain addiction – 97% of addicts have Complex Trauma • We now see that it results in many physical problems; relationship problems; and many self-esteem issues • Difficulties people have in coping with stress

3. We now recognize that many Mental Health issues stem from Complex Trauma - Depressive Disorders, ADHD, Anxiety Disorders, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Conduct Disorder, Attachment Disorders, Psychotic Disorders, Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Specific Phobias, DID, psychopath • Note: Addiction is not the only result of CT • Conclusion: As I look at our culture and our world, I see Complex Trauma everywhere. We live in a world that is inflicting more and more Complex Trauma on its residents

4. Definition of Trauma– an event that a person perceives as being both dangerous and beyond their ability to handle, so that they fear they will be hurt, die or go crazy. • Two types of Trauma • Simple – a one-time horrific event • Complex – repeated instances - When a child does not feel safe, when they can’t fully relax, when they feel all alone in keeping themselves safe and in handling the world – F,F,F -They walk on egg shells, are always on guard; they can’t trust anyone but themselves for safety

5. Trauma is partly connected to the actual events and partly due to the perception of those events • Complex trauma is experienced most easily by sensitive children • Many may have never considered the fact that they experienced Complex Trauma. They came from a decent home. Or the trauma was so common, it was their normal • There are degrees of trauma • What we are learning is that the subtle forms of Complex Trauma can be just as damaging as the severe forms

6. Most of the effects of this trauma happen at a subconscious level • My concern – discussing trauma may stir up old memories and painful emotions • A common response if the Complex Trauma was caused by parents: • You are blaming them for your problems • You are bad, disrespectful and disloyal for talking about your family this way

7. Causes of Complex Trauma • Abuse – physical, sexual, verbal, emotional, spiritual - Includes being bullied at school; or an dictator parent • Abandonment – death of parent, divorce of parents, CFS, adoption; addiction • Neglect – emotionally unavailable, workaholics, parents dealing with mental illness, chronic illness or other problems, parents without the tools to parent well • Failure to meet, or Inconsistently meeting, basic human needs

8. Response - When there is no solution to painful/trauma circumstances • Priorities develop • To not get hurt – survival mode • To get these emotional needs met • Note: The priority of not getting hurt trumps all other priorities. The goal becomes getting your needs met without getting hurt. This actually sets one up to not get their needs met in a healthy way. • Not getting hurt = Fight/Flight/Freeze • Live in survivor mode; stop growing

9. Trauma pain Read danger Into events, Worst Case scenario Signs of Danger; Hyper- vigilance Uncomfortable Emotions, stress • Trigger is followed by nanosecond response that escalates to great intensity in a nanosecond • Simple Trauma – FFF = adaptive • Complex Trauma – FFF = maladaptive • Every child faces fearful situations. What creates trauma is facing it alone F,F,F

10. Complex Trauma and the Brain • Cortisol • Important for one-time event trauma • Burns into memory • Adrenalin – energy to fight or flight • If danger is ongoing (Complex Trauma) • Cortisol burns brain bridge • Gaps in memory are common for kids from Complex Trauma

11. The brain stores memories in two parts of brain – details and emotions. One may not remember the details, but the emotions are still triggered • Oxytocin • Love/connection chemical • Makes child run to parent for comfort; makes parent run to child to hug • Released in large doses – Birth, nursing • Sex; Kissing and hugging • Note: Sex and relationship addiction

13. Limbic Brain vs Cerebral Cortex • Limbic - Emotional brain; Child brain • Makes decisions based on how it feels • Makes decisions based on immediate gratification or safety. Doesn’t think long term • Cortex - Wise brain; adult brain • Makes decisions based on long term consequences • Cortex gets divided by CT – distorted thinking and wise thinking

14. Dynamics that produce Complex Trauma • Boils down to an abuse of authority • Instead of using position of power to meet needs of those under their authority, they use it to be selfish and have everything go the way they want it. It’s all about them. • Result - Parents don’t consistently meet the basic needs of the children - The children’s needs are seen as an inconvenience

15. Major Distortion takes place - Children are told they are selfish for having needs. It’s their fault that the parent is upset. They are made to feel bad for having needs, or their needs are just neglected • The children often have to become parents to their parents – the responsibility of needs fulfillment shifts from parents to children • Question – Don’t all kids experience trauma? • Dysfuntional family – family in pain • Create pain and can’t resolve pain

16. Path to healing – bio-psycho-social-spiritual • To focus only on one aspect usually provides some help, but it can hurt a person too if they are made to feel it’s the only aspect • Five people inside most addicts • Addict you • Traumatized you • Mental health you • Child • Adult