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Double Binds Family and Divorce

Stephanie Gillooly FS – 121 November 2, 2011. Double Binds Family and Divorce. Divorce in the United States. 11 % of the United States population is divorced Average length of divorce proceedings: 1 year 50% of first marriages end in divorce 1 in 4 adults has had a divorce.

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Double Binds Family and Divorce

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  1. Stephanie Gillooly FS – 121 November 2, 2011 Double BindsFamily and Divorce

  2. Divorce in the United States • 11 % of the United States population is divorced • Average length of divorce proceedings: 1 year • 50% of first marriages end in divorce • 1 in 4 adults has had a divorce

  3. Children Involved in Divorce • 40% of divorced mothers reported that they had interfered with the fathers visitation to punish him. • 50% of mothers see no value in the fathers continued contact with his children. • 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes • Nearly 2 of every 5 children in America do not live with their fathers

  4. Children’s Double Binds • Can’t please their parents • Parents mad about child’s choice of one or the other • Mom’s house • Dad’s house • Can’t win

  5. Children’s Double Binds • Child as mediator • Parents argue through child • Child doesn’t know what to say • Caught in the middle • Child blamed • Wrong either way

  6. Parent Double Binds • Deciding where the child(ren) will live • Either way the child will be missing out • Divorce Proceedings • Money • House • Custody

  7. Step-Parent Double Binds • Can’t get in the middle • Accused of not caring if they don’t • Negative connotations

  8. Consequences • Child develops anger because they cant make the “right” choice • Child resents parent(s) • Blames them when older • Parents hate each other • Loss of communication

  9. Possible Ways to Get Out • Child tells parents how they feel • Wont choose one over the other • Doesn’t want to be in the middle • Family therapists • Parents need to compromise • Think of the child first • Child > money/house

  10. Works Cited • http://www.divorcestatistics.org/ • http://www.census.gov/hhes/socdemo/marriage/ • http://www.divorcerate.org/ • http://www.childadvocate.net/divorce_effects_on_children.htm

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