Healthy Relationships

1. Healthy Relationships Why we have them and what they look like

2. Why Get in a relationship? • People enter into intimate relationships for a variety of reasons: • Intimacy • Companionship • Money • Sex • Security (or low self worth) • It’s the cool thing to do • They are forced to • Can you think of any other reasons?

3. Why do human’s need relationships • Human’s have several reasons why intimate relationships are important to them: • All animals have an innate need to procreate and pass on their genetic information (all sexual desire is based on this) • There is a link between human physical health and healthy relationships • We love to have someone to share our joy’s and sorrows • It is a societal norm

4. Characteristics of a Healthy Relationship There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. There will be times when partners are angry or defensive, but none of this should lead to abuse. There are some key elements of a healthy relationship. Being aware of these elements will help an individual realize when a relationship is unhealthy.

5. The 6 Keys to Healthy Relationships

6. Respect • Mutual respect means that both parties care for themselves as well as each other. • Considerate to other’s boundaries, need for personal space, and vulnerabilities. • Neither person puts down or denigrates the other. • Causing change in a person (e.g., dress style, hairstyle, group of friends, sexual demands) through manipulation, coercion, and threats are not healthy. • Both parties understand that you cannot change one another. • Things that need to be changed in a relationship come through effective communication and mutual agreement.

7. Consensual Enjoyable Intimacy • The sexual experience in a relationship should be equitable, mutually agreed upon and enjoyed. • Both parties should feel free to express their needs and boundaries and have them respected, so that one person does not end up feeling like they have to give in to the other. • If one person does not want to have sex, their wishes must be respected. • In healthy relationships, problems and issues related to sexuality are openly communicated without fear.

8. Trust • There should be a sense of companionship and caring. • There should be no lying, manipulation or secrets.

9. Support • Partners always feel like they are supported in their decisions and endeavors.

10. Easygoing • The overall tone of the relationship is relaxed. • Both parties can laugh at themselves without humour being at the other person’s expense. • Both parties will feel comfortable communicating their thoughts, feelings, likes, dislikes and ideas (e.g., where to go on a date, world issues, status of the relationship). • Healthy relationships are void of physical aggression or threats of physical aggression.

11. Fair Fighting • Arguments, disagreements and issues are a part of every relationship. Conflict does not mean that the relationship has gone sour. In fact, healthy couples argue because: • they feel comfortable communicating their feelings and aren’t afraid that the relationship will end with each argument • there is a sense of security because they know they can share their feelings openly • they care about one another and they do not want unresolved issues to remain unsolved

12. “Newlyweds” Assignment • As we watch several episodes of the hit MTV reality show “Newlyweds” jot down 3 examples of how Nick and Jessica’s relationship might be considered healthy and 3 examples of how it might be considered unhealthy • Get into a group and compile a list of the 3 best healthy and 3 best unhealthy examples • After you group has done this you will share your results with the class