ACVV PRESENTS

1. ACVV PRESENTS SEXUAL ABUSE PREVENTION PROGRAM

2. Introduction • ACVV • Definitions Sexual abuse Neglect ABUSE Physical abuse Emotional abuse

3. DEFINITIONS • Child – A person under the age of 18 years • CHILD ABUSE • 4 types: Child neglect Physical abuse Emotional abuse Sexual abuse WHAT IS ABUSE??? • Hitting a child or causing deliberate injury; • Leaving a child without adult supervision; • Forcing a child to touch you; • Exposing a child to pornographic material; • Verbally abusing a child; • Touching a child inappropriately; • Neglecting a child’s educational needs; • Not providing for a child’s basic needs of clothing, food, shelter; • Bullying by another child.

4. NEGLECTED CHILD: • A failure of the parents to provide for the child’s basic physical, intellectual and emotional needs (health, nutrition, protection, shelter, education).

5. NEGLECT • SIGNS OF NELGECT: • Constant hunger • Poor hygiene • Lice, scabies, sores, infections, worms • History of malnutrition and diarrhea at Hospital • Steals or begs for food • Says there is no one to care for him or her • Very skinny • Dirty clothes • No supervision at home or left with younger children

6. PHYSICAL ABUSE • Physical child abuse is physical injury inflicted upon the child with cruel and/or malicious intent. • Physical abuse can be the result of punching, beating, kicking, biting, burning, shaking, or otherwise harming a child physically. There is a difference between physical abuse and discipline!

7. SIGNS OF PHYSICAL ABUSE: • Strange / unbelievable explanations for injuries • Broken bones • Bite marks and black eye • Multiple bruises of different ages • Unexplained bruises, welts or burns • Absence from school • Head injuries • Crying when it is time to go home • Afraid of physical contact with adults • Behaviour disorders

8. EMOTIONAL ABUSE • Emotional abuse degrades a child’s sense of achievement, diminishes a sense of belonging, and stands in the way of healthy, happy development • Emotional abuse is when a parents verbally abuses a child and makes them feel undervalued

9. SIGNS OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE: • Low self esteem • Withdrawn • Over eager to please • Shows affection indiscriminately • No personal boundaries • Does not show affection • Poor relationship with family and peer groups • Unattended problems/needs of child • Afraid and shy

10. SEXUAL ABUSE • Having sex with a child; • Having sex in front of a child on purpose; • Showing the child pornography; • Touching a child to stimulate the child or oneself; • Showing a child one’s private parts (breasts, vagina, penis); • Masturbating in front of a child; • Watching a child undress, bath or use the bathroom to sexually gratify oneself.

11. TYPES OF SEXUAL ABUSE: • Incest • Rape / Sodomy • Oral sex • Indecent assault • Exhibitionism • Pornography • Peeping • Verbally abusive sex talk

12. SIGNS OF SEXUAL ABUSE • Changes in the child’s behaviour • Physical signs • Emotional signs

13. SIGNS OF SEXUAL ABUSE • Age inappropriate knowledge and interest in sex • Sex games and acting out • Secrecy • Clinging behaviour • Afraid to go home • Suicide attempts • Wears layers of clothing • Avoids bathrooms (sports activities) • Change in eating and sleeping patterns • Unexplained money or gifts • Genital itching and scratching • Can’t sit on their bottom • Bed wetting • Vaginal or anal discharge

14. Sexual Grooming • The abusive adult is often someone who the child knows and trusts (a close family member, family friend or neighbor). • The child experiences confusing emotions towards the abusive adult of love (because the abuser is often known and trusted) and hate (because they are hurting the child). • The grooming process refers to the relationship that the abuser creates between themselves and the child. The abusive adult spends time with the child and treats them with gifts, presents and outings. • This grooming relationship builds trust between the child and the abusive adult. The abuse may start with the abusive adult touching the child and may escalate to more sexualized touching of the child’s genitals (private parts) and even sexual intercourse.

15. SECRECY: • The abusive adult may suggest to the child that there is a game and a “special” secret that s/he cannot tell anyone. Children are frequently taught to listen to and obey adults. Hence, many children will listen to and obey the abusive adult in keeping the abuse secret. • The abusive adult may also threaten the child to keep the abuse a secret. The abusive adult may manipulate the child by giving them gifts and sweets • The abusive adult may say the following things to the child to keep the abuse a secret: • “Don’t tell or I’ll kill you / your mother” • “No one will ever believe you” • “This is your fault” • “If you tell, they will be angry with you” • “This is how people show that they love each other” • “If you tell, they will take you away” • “If you tell, I wont love you anymore”

16. POWERLESSNESS: • The child may experience a power imbalance in the abusive relationship and hence the child feels they have to listen to the abusive adult. • The child sees the adult as being big and strong and they feel small and weak. • No child has equal power to an adult to “Just say NO”. • The child is made to feel helpless, vulnerable and powerless in the abusive situation.

17. ENTRAPMENT / ACCOMODATION: • The child feels trapped (because of the threats and secrets) and that s/he has no choice but to not tell anyone about the abuse. • If the child does not get help when the abuse occurs, then the child has to survive the abuse; they have to accommodate the abuse. This often makes the child feel that they are to blame for the abuse, and they may feel guilty. • The child may feel angry towards the non-abusive parent or caregivers for not being able to stop the abuse.

18. What do I do if a child is being abused? • Report it to the social worker or police station • LEGALLY, any one over the age of 18 years old who SUSPECTS a child is being abused, HAS TO report it!

19. What do I do if a child tells me that they are being abused? • Number 1 : BELIEVE THE CHILD! • Don’t look shocked, stay clam • Listen without asking too many questions • Write the information down (when, where, who, how) • Assure the child that they are NOT responsible for what happened to them • Tell the child that they are brave for telling you • Tell the child that it must have been very difficult and painful for them • Tell the child that you need to tell others

20. WHAT TO DO • Tell the police or social worker • DO NOT ALLOW THE CHILD TO Bath if they have just been abused • Collect the child’s clothing/bedding in a BROWN paper bag (NOT plastic) • The police will call the FCS who will take the child to the district surgeon for a medical exam.

21. How can I protect my child? • Talk to them about feelings • Talk to them about touches • Teach them that good touches make us feel happy and safe inside • Teach them that bad touches make us feel funny, scared, angry inside • Tell them that they must tell you if someone gives them a bad feeling or a bad touch

22. Summary • Child abuse • Neglect • Physical abuse • Emotional abuse • Sexual abuse • How you can protect your child

23. Thank you for listening