Protecting our Children from sexual abuse

1. Protecting our Children from sexual abuse By Natalia Mercado and Bonnie Fries The Children’s Advocacy Center of North and Northwest Cook County

2. The Children’s Advocacy Center The Children's Advocacy Center of North and Northwest Cook County continuously strives to reduce trauma and provide support to child victims of violence and their families. The Center serves as a community resource to facilitate the identification, intervention and prevention of child abuse.

3. Presentation objectives: • You will be able to: • Define and understand sexual abuse and its prevalence • Recognize indicators of sexual abuse • Know how to respond to a child who discloses abuse • Indentify and address child abuse prevention • Learn about additional resources

4. What is child sexual abuse? • Child sexual abuse is any interaction between a child and an adult (or another child) in which the child is used for the sexual stimulation of the perpetrator or an observer. Sexual abuse can include both touching and non-touching behaviors. Touching behaviors may involve touching of the vagina, penis, breasts or buttocks, oral-genital contact, or sexual intercourse. Non-touching behaviors can include voyeurism (trying to look at a child’s naked body), exhibitionism, or exposing the child to pornography. • Abusers often do not use physical force, but may use play, deception, threats, or other forms of coercion to engage children and maintain their silence. Abusers frequently employ persuasive and manipulative tactics to keep the child engaged. These tactics—referred to as “grooming”—may include buying gifts or arranging special activities, which can further confuse the victim • -www.nctsn.org

5. PREVALENCE • The U.S. Department of Justice reports that 67% of all sexual assault victims are children. • Approximately 1 in 3 females AND 1 in 6 males are sexually abused by the age of 18. (Briere & Eliot, 2003) • Nearly 88% of sexual abuse is never reported. (Hanson, Resnick, Suanders, Kilpatrick, & Best, 1999)

6. PREVALENCE • Over 90% of child victims are sexually abused by someone they know and trust. (Finklehor, 1994) • As much as half of all child sexual abuse is committed by children under the age of 18. (Hunter, Figueredo, Malamuth, & Becker, 2003)

7. Why don’t children tell about sexual abuse? • There are many reasons children do not disclose being sexually abused, including: • Threats of bodily harm (to the child and/or the child’s family) • Fear of being removed from the home • Fear of not being believed • Shame or guilt

8. Continued • If the abuser is someone the child or the family cares about, the child may worry about getting that person in trouble. • Seeing the sexual abuse as their own fault • Fear of getting in trouble • Not having the language skills to communicate about the abuse • Not understanding that the actions of the perpetrator are abusive • A game

9. Indicators of Sexual Abuse • Physical Indicators: • Sexually Transmitted Infections • Genital discharge or infection • Trauma or irritation to anal/genital area • Pain upon urination/defecation • Difficulty walking or sitting due to pain • Somatic complaints

10. Indicators of Sexual Abuse • Behavioral Indicators: • Enuresis • Encopresis • Eating disturbances • Fears or phobias • Change in school performance • Regressive behavior • Difficulty concentrating • Sleep disturbances/night terrors

11. Indicators of Sexual Abuse • Sexual Behaviors of Children: • Detailed and age-inappropriate understanding of sexual behavior • Inappropriate, unusual, or aggressive sexual behavior with peers or toys • Compulsive indiscreet masturbation • Excessive curiosity about sexual matters or genitals • Seductive behavior with peers or adults

12. What To Do If A Child Discloses Abuse? • Do not deny the problem • Believe the child no matter how unbelievable the information sounds • Remain calm • Never blame, punish or embarrass the child • Reassure the child she/he is safe • Contact the authorities – DCFS/Police • Seek medical attention • Seek counseling

13. Who Are Mandated Reporters? • Medical Personnel • School Personnel • Social Service/Mental Health Personnel • Law Enforcement Personnel • Coroner/Medical Examiner • Child Care Personnel

14. When To Report • Report incidents as soon as you notice them • The laws clearly specify that reports must be made when the individual “suspects” or “has reasonable cause to believe” that abuse or neglect has occurred • Actual abuse or neglect does not have to be confirmed, only suspected.

15. Things To Consider When Making A Report • Since the signs of sexual abuse can be uncertain, if the child tells you he/she is being abused, report it. • Have there been past incidents which, in retrospect, may have been suspicious? • Know what is the school protocol for making reports • Note any anecdotal evidence you might have • Let the hotline know if it they need to respond right away due to safety issues at home

16. How To Report: • Call DCFS at 1-800-25-ABUSE • Reports Should Include the Following: • Child’s Name, Date of Birth, Age • Child’s Address and Present Location • Names and Ages of Siblings • Parent’s Name and Address • Nature and Extent of Injury or Condition • Statement Made by the Child • Name of Alleged Perpetrator/Relationship • Reporter’s Name and Location

17. Consequences For Failure to Report • Misdemeanor Criminal charges • Report to licensing agency REMEMBER:it is not up to you to substantiate a report, just to report any suspicion/ disclosure of abuse.

18. Prevention of Abuse • Teach your child to say “no” to unwanted touching or anything that makes them feel uncomfortable or fearful • Tell her/him to tell a trusted adult if something bad happens • Ask you child about his/her day at school or with babysitters and friends • Encourage your child not to keep secrets • Encourage your child to discuss concerns or questions with you

19. Prevention of Abuse • Teach your child the appropriate terminology for “private” parts • Explain to your child that their bodies are special. Every part of their body is good, but some parts of their body are private. • Clearly identify for your child which parts of their anatomy are private. If your child is young, consider sharing the above information during their bath time. Another idea is to have your child dress in a bathing suit and show them that all areas covered by a bathing suit are "private." • Let your child know they must tell you if anyone touches them in the private areas – no matter who the person is, or what the person says to them. Assure your child they will not be in trouble if they tell you they've been touched inappropriately – rather, you will be proud of them, and help them through the situation.

20. Recommendations: • Schools: • Background checks on all staff, volunteers, parent volunteers • Mandated reporter training for all staff (including bus drivers, aids, and other support staff) • Assign a go-to person for all DCFS reports • Establish policies about bathroom situations and about students alone with adults • Implement personal safety curriculum

21. Online Resources • http://www.positivepromotions.com/My-Body-Is-Mine-Educational-Activities-Book/p/KCB-363/ (EDUCATIONAL BOOKLET) • http://www.nsvrc.org/publications/child-sexual-abuse-prevention-programs-children (PROGRAM IDEAS FOR SCHOOL) • http://www.safetybear.net/id15.html (GENERAL RESOURCE) • http://www.nctsn.org/ (MORE ACADEMIC AND PROFESSIONAL) • National Children’s Alliance (www.nationalchildrensalliance.org) • American Bar Association Center of Children and the Law (www.abanet.org/child)

22. Suggested Reading • For Children and families: • Some Parts are NOT for Sharing by Julie K. Federico • Your Body Belongs to You by Cornelia Spelman - Albert Whitman & Company, Morton Grove, IL - Storybook for ages 3-6 • The Gift of Fear; Survival Skills That Protect Us from Violence by Gavin DeBecker • Child Lures by Kenneth Wooden • Those are MY Private Partswww.thosearemyprivateparts.com • My Body Belongs to Me by Jill Starishevsky

23. Suggested Reading: • For Children and Families: • Freeman, L. (1982). It’s MY body. Seattle, WA: Parenting Press, Inc. • Girard, L.W. (1992). My body is private. Morton Grove, IL: Prairie Paperbacks, Albert Whitman and Company. • Ottenweiler, J. (1991). Please tell! A child’s story about sexual abuse. Center City, MN: Hazelden Foundation. • Spelman, C.M., (2000). Your body belongs to you. Morton Grove, IL: Prairie Paperbacks, Albert Whitman and Company. • Stauffer, L. and Deblinger, E. (2003). Let’s talk about taking care of you: An educational book about body safety. Hatfield, PA: Hope for Families.

24. Suggested Reading • For Parents: • Haffner, Debra W. (2008). From diapers to dating: A parent’s guide to raising sexually healthy children – from infancy to middle school, 2nd edition. New York: Newmarket Press. • Hickling, Meg. (2005) The new speaking of sex: What your children need to know and when they need to know it. Kelowna, BC, Canada: Wood Lake Publishing, Inc. • Roffman, Deborah M. (2002). But how’d I get here in the first place? Talking to your young child about sex. New York: Perseus Publishing.

25. How to contact the CAC? Children’s Advocacy Center: 640 Illinois Blvd. Hoffman Estates, IL Main: 847-885-0100 Fax: 847-885-0187 Safe from the Start program: 1535 Burgundy Pkwy Streamwood, IL 60107 Main: 630-540-0549 Fax: 630-540-9366

26. Questions??? • Yes, we can come back and provide more presentations! • Yes, we can add you to our email server to keep you informed about our events! • THANK YOU!!!